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Kindness & Compassion as Common Ground

If you’re searching for a common ground that has positive implications for both you and for others, kindness and compassion is a good beginning.

Kindness and Compassion is the starting point for us. Why begin here? 

We’ve often thought about what we do as financial advisers and have determined that relationships are important in more ways than money can provide. That Lenity, which means kindness and compassion, is not only the name we’ve chosen for our business, it’s also a way of life. It’s the way we work and educate in our collaborations with people each day. Kindness and compassion can positively impact so much in life.

Compassion – gives us the ability to understand someone else’s situation and the desire to take action to improve their lives. For people who are dependent on others for help and support, compassion is often the most important factor in allowing them to lead fulfilling lives.

Kindness – Witnessing acts of kindness produces oxytocin, occasionally referred to as the ‘love hormone’ which aids in lowering blood pressure and improving our overall heart-health. Oxytocin also increases our self-esteem and optimism. —Dartmouth Wellness

Being compassionate toward others is important. Yet, one of the things we share and guide our clients toward is how to be more compassionate with yourself. 

Over the past few years, research has shown that people who practice self-compassion are happier, more productive, and more likely to form and keep good habits. 

So once you’ve got good habits, we’d like you to keep them going. It takes a whole bunch of courage to open up about things as personal as your financial life. So, if you can understand how courageous you are—you just might have a little more compassion for yourself. And, that compassion will keep you moving forward with good habits.

Random acts of kindness matter for us all

While you’re working on your own self-compassion, it’s valuable to remember how much those random acts of kindness impact not just someone else, but you as well! And, as this list of 10 random acts of kindness illustrates, kindness can be pretty easy to do.

10 random acts of kindness

  1.     Smile
  2.     Hold the door open
  3.     Give an honest compliment
  4.     Thank someone who you appreciate
  5.     Be a good listener
  6.     Offer your help to someone
  7.     Ask the person who’s serving you how their day is going
  8.     Treat someone to a coffee or tea
  9.     Let someone go past you in the grocery queue
  10.     Send flowers or chocolates to a friend out of the blue

You’ve probably done one or even all of these 10 random acts of kindness in your lifetime. But, it’s easy to forget to perform such simple acts on a daily basis amidst the stressors of everyday life. There’s not much required to share a smile, except to remember to smile. Or, to say “thank you” to the person at the grocery check-out.

We’re not here to tell you to be kinder or more compassionate, but we are here to remind you of the benefits to you and to others around you. When you are kinder and more compassionate to yourself, you’re then more able to be kinder and more compassionate toward others. 

So, here are a few simple ways to practice self-compassion:

  1. Take care of yourself – make nutrition, exercise and rest an important part of your lifestyle.
  2. Understand your limits – give yourself permission to say no. A good way to say no, if you’re uncomfortable with saying no…”I’m sorry, I can’t right now, but will let you know when and if I can.” 
  3. Allow yourself to be human be understanding of your own personal limitations. Allow yourself permission to be imperfect and have compassion for those moments when you’re flawed or make a mistake, or even lazy on occasion. Human imperfections are, well, part of being human. Give yourself a break. Own it, then move on. “It’s about cultivating a perspective over ourselves so we never shut ourselves down and never lose faith in our own potential just because we may fly off the deep end one night.” Podcast host Chelsea Leigh Trescott, Psychology Today

Alongside a truer understanding of self-compassion is the understanding of compassion in general. “Part of compassion is knowing that at some point, everyone hurts. In this way the pain is relatable. While pain is a personal experience, it is also a common and unavoidable part of what it means to be human. Thus we feel a further joining with others in the shared recognition that pain is part of existence.” —Seth J. Gillihan Ph.D. Psychology Today

Our hope is that one person at a time, one simple yet impactful act of kindness, one thoughtful revelation by you to be more compassionate with yourself, will bring us all closer and provide that common ground.

Sources:

https://www.forbes.com/sites/francesbridges/2020/01/24/how-to-practice-self-compassion-in-the-new-year/#7d35d08d1aba

https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2019/02/190206200344.htm

https://happyologist.co.uk/happiness/10-random-acts-of-kindness/

Lenity Financial, Inc.- https://lenityfinancial.com/what-does-financial-wellness-mean-to-you/

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